– Transcript 136
R: Good evening. It’s good to be with you once again. I welcome you with all my heart.
Never take life seriously. There is nothing in this world that should be taken seriously. I know you’ve been told that you have to be serious if you want to get anywhere.
But where do you want to get? (laughter) There is no place to go. There is really nothing to get. You are already perfect, bright and shining, pure. All you have to do is to awaken to your real nature. Then you will realize yourself, completely, totally that there is nowhere to go and nothing to get.
Instead of wasting your time taking life seriously do your utmost to awaken, to wake up! Do not pay any attention to your aches, to your pains, to your mental anguish, to the world situation these things come and go.
Since the beginning of time we have had all kinds of people on this planet going through all kinds of experiences. Man’s inhumanity to man has always been here. Wars, earthquakes, cataclysms, they have always been with us since the beginning of time. And it’s funny to me that people are trying to straighten things out. You can’t straighten anything out. You may appear to straighten something out for a while. But it will return again just the way it was. This is why I always tell you, “All is well and everything is unfolding as it should.”
You may not be able to see this right now. Some of you may believe that you’ve got financial problems. You’ve got mental anguish about something. You have physical problems. The point is you must turn away from these things. Turn completely away and focus on the I-am. The real Self, the absolute reality and you will laugh everyday. You will be happier than any happiness this world can give you.
Most of you right now are searching for the ultimate happiness. You think when you get married you’ll be happy, when you get divorced you’ll be happy, when you get a degree in school you’ll be happy, when you get a great job you’ll be happy. Why doesn’t it work that way? This is not always the case.
You know people or yourself who have strived for a certain position in life. Who work very hard to attain a certain position in life to be in a certain place or where they can be successful, rich, famous whatever. Then when you get there it’s not what you expected and you’re disappointed. Or some calamity may take place, something may happen to the job or to the family. Nothing in this world is certain. Therefore do not take this world seriously. Be the witness to your condition, to the world condition and then discover who the witness is.
Life is interesting. I was taking a walk in the park this morning it was such a beautiful day. I sat down on a bench and closed my eyes. Then I felt the presence of someone else who sat down near me. And I felt that this person was going to tell me all his troubles, and sure enough he did. (students laugh)
He started talking to me out of the blue, telling me about his rheumatoid arthritis.
That his bones are getting real stiff. His fingers are getting knolled. He is in real bad shape.
I never looked at him, I kept my eyes closed and I asked him, “What are you doing about this?” So he said, “Years ago I went to the doctors and he gave me all kinds of drugs and it made things worse. But what I’m really upset about is that I’m a Christian scientist and I’m not supposed to get sick. I know Christian science backwards and frontwards. I know all the rules and regulations. Why did this happen to me?” I inquired, “What have you been practicing as far as Christian science is concerned to help you with the problem?” So he remarked, “I’ve been knowing the truth. That disease does not exist and God is all there is.
God is the first principle, the first cause and disease cannot possibly exist.”
So I waited a moment or two and then I asked him, “If you say disease does not exist how come you’re announcing it? How can you say disease does not exist and then all of a sudden believe that you’re healed? When just by voicing disease does not exist means that you believe in disease. Otherwise how can you utter the word? Where would disease come from? Where would the word come from? There is something in your subconscious that knows, disease. For you would not proclaim that disease would not exist. Do you hear what I’m trying to say? The word disease in itself can only be known by a person who feels disease. If you didn’t know about disease there would be no such word. There would be no word like health or disease. Disease is the opposite of health. If you believe you’re healthy then you also believe in disease. Do you understand what I’m saying?”
And he said, “A little but not too much.” I explained it again, “You keep affirming that disease does not exist. How can you affirm that? Only if you realize that disease is an entity. It’s a power. It’s real. Would you be able to say it doesn’t exist? There has to be somebody to experience it. So they can say it doesn’t exist. If you were healthy all the time you would never be speaking about health or disease. But because you’ve got rheumatoid arthritis you’re trying to heal yourself by saying disease does not exist. What you’re really doing is causing the condition to get worse.” And then I asked him, “What do you mean that God is all in all? What is God?” He answered, “Why God is a supreme power, the creation of heaven and earth. This is God.”
So I further explained, “Now we’re dealing with three entities. We’re dealing with disease that does not exist. We’re dealing with your body that seems to have a disease and we’re dealing with God who is all in all. We really have a battle on our hands, if we’re dealing with all of these things. When you go to sleep and you are in deep sleep do you feel rheumatoid arthritis anywhere?” He exclaimed, “No I don’t!”
“When you dream do you feel your disease?” He said, “No I don’t I feel the dream.” “It is only when you’re awake, so-to-speak, that you feel this don’t you?” And he said, “Yes.” So I further continued and I said, Why don’t you begin with yourself? Forget about God. Forget about the disease. Those are unknowable right now.
Begin with yourself. Ask yourself the question, “Who has the disease when I awake? I do not seem to have them in deep sleep or when I dream. It is only when I’m awake that I seem to have these symptoms.” So I asked him, “Who has it?” He said, “I do.”
And I explained, “That is just the point. You don’t have it, ‘I’ does. What you call ‘I’ has the problem. Do you not exclaim this to yourself when you say, ‘I have this disease?’” So he asked me, “Doesn’t ‘I’ mean the body?”
And I said, “Not necessarily. The body in itself is a lump of flesh and bones and blood. How can it have a disease? When the body is sleeping, when the body is dreaming, when the body is dead it does not have any disease it has nothing. It is only when you think of ‘I,’ ‘I’ as the personal self. It is ‘I’ who has this problem, not you but ‘I.’ Not you but ‘I.’ Where does the I come from? You have to inquire within yourself.” I explained. “It begins and ends with you. You have to ask yourself. Where does the I which seems to have this problem come from? What is its source?” He said, “I don’t know?”
I answered “You’re not supposed to know. Don’t worry about knowing or not knowing. Forget about who knows, who doesn’t know. Simply ask the question to yourself, “Where does the ‘I’ who appears to have a disease come from? And keep still.” He said, “Well if I keep still I won’t have the answer.” I said, “That is just the point. Every answer is wrong. As long as you come up with an answer, it’s not the right answer. For you are dealing with infinity. You’re dealing with the absolute reality. That knows nothing about disease or the ‘I’ or the body or the mind.” I kept still.
Then I felt a lightness and I opened one eye and he was gone. Probably couldn’t take the heat. (laughter)
Now let’s talk about you. Think of all the so-called problems you think you have.
It makes no difference what they are. You identify with them. You always want to correct them. Set things right. You always want to do something to alleviate the suffering, the pain. People have tried this since the beginning of time. No one has ever succeeded.
It’s hard to tell you to leave the world alone. And leave your body alone. And leave your affairs alone. This sounds sort of selfish. For in your way of thinking you say, “If I leave these things alone who will do them? How will they get done?” You always believe that the I, the I-thought, the personal self has to do something. Has to react to situations, become angry, become frustrated, feel out of place, out of sorts yet this is not the truth.
You did not have to come to this earth to be born in a body. Yet here you sit. There is something that knows how to do everything for you. There is something that knows how to take care of you. How to give you eternal happiness and peace and love. This can only happen when you get yourself out of the way. You get yourself out of the way by not worrying, by not fretting, by not being afraid, by not comparing, by leaving everything alone. Leaving everything alone. Not by arguing or debating or trying to prove a point but by leaving everything alone.
You may ask, “If I see a person in need shouldn’t I help him?” Yes you should.
Something will make you help them if that is what you’re meant to do. You will know what to do spontaneously. You will do the right things. But if you think about it then you will not necessarily do the right thing. Because when you think it is your ego that thinks.
Your ego is not your friend. Your ego wants to keep you human. Keep you grounded.
Keep you in duality. Keep you striving and struggling. When you begin to ignore your ego it will go away.
It is interesting that most psychologists, psychiatrists will ask, “How can you survive without an ego?” They ask this because they never had an experience of a non-ego.
They only share with you what they’ve learned in books in school. They share with you what people have told them. There is hardly a psychiatrist or a psychologist or anybody else who have had an experience of a non-ego. So they try to shape your life so you will fit in society. Who wants to fit into society? You want to awaken to reality, not fit into society.
You have been given an opportunity in this life by having a so-called body with which to work in order to awaken from the mortal dream. Yet you use this opportunity for other purposes. You use it to attain name and fame as if that is going to do anything for you in the long run. You use it to develop powers, you’re wasting your effort. Karmically you have been given this body to transcend, to transmute. To let go. To surrender. Yet you spend all of your time doing the opposite.
You waste your time by reacting to everything that comes your way. I tell you things again and again but you keep doing it again and again. Think of the last time when you reacted to person, place, and thing. Try to understand what is happening if you’re not awakened. If you believe you’re not awakened, you’re not free, you’re not liberated when you react to person, place or thing, you come under the law of karma which appears to exist.
I know there are many people in Advaita Vedanta who tell me, “Well you know Robert karma does not exist. Only the Self exists. Only effortless pure awareness exists. So why are you telling us about karma?” In truth you have to look at yourself and ask yourself, “Have I experienced pure awareness? Have I experienced absolute reality? I can’t afford to put on an act. It will only go against me.” You have to speak to yourself this way.
Therefore I know that if I’m still reacting with my body. I still believe that I am the doer, do not fool yourself. Be truthful with yourself. Therefore if I’m still reacting. If I still believe that I am the body then there are other bodies in this world that respond to me.
And there is karma, there is reincarnation. All these things exist for me only because I believe I am a body. I therefore have to be careful what I’ve got to do with myself.
So whenever you react to a condition you’re setting the so-called law of karma which doesn’t really exist, you’re setting yourself up. It’s as if you’re stepping on a rake
and the handle hits you in the face. That is immediate karma. Therefore if you tell me that karma does not exist I tell you, “Step on the rake,” and if the handle hits you in the head that is karma. That is called boomerang karma. (laughter) It came back to you immediately. Yet there are all kinds of karma. That is why people appear to get away with things.
That is why we cannot understand why a good person must die early and a so-called evil person seems to live and prosper sometimes. We do not see the whole picture. We see a partial picture. For our life is here partially. We’re here today and we’re gone tomorrow. It is therefore impossible to know the whole picture.
So say for instance you find yourself mangled by a car that hits you and you’ve been such a good person. You’ve given to the poor, you’ve helped the homeless. And now that this car has hit you, you’re all mangled and you can’t use your arms or legs any longer. You’re blind in one eye. You’re a total wreck. If you were able to see the whole picture you would see that in a previous existence you belonged to a savage tribe and it was your duty to torture prisoners when they were captured. And now karma is paying you back. That is all karma is, a pay back.
So while we’re on the path to liberation we have to be very careful what we do with our lives. Every little thing is karmic. It is only when you awaken, when you are liberated that none of this exists. This is why I tell you so often, “Do not fool yourself.”
Look at how many times a day you become angry. You feel cheated, you feel exploited.
You feel something is wrong someplace. You feel depressed. You go and do something to cause this condition to stop and whatever you do you’re accruing karma.
There is only one way to overcome this. And that is to forget about the world, forget about your body, forget about situations and go deep within yourself inquiring, “To whom does this come? Who is experiencing karma?” Do not feel sorry for yourself if you’re ill or something not going right in your life. Do not compare yourself with others.
Remember you’re only seeing a partial picture. You’re not seeing the whole picture at all.
It’s like the example I give when you look through a keyhole. You see somebody choking somebody else through the keyhole and you’re saying, “Why is he doing this to this person? He’s a no good murderer.” But then you open the door and you’re able to see the past and the future. You see in a past life the person getting choked used to work for the state on the gallows and used to hang people, some innocent people. And you go back to the middle picture. Now somebody’s choking him in this life. And you go back to a future picture now they’re both laughing. Nobody was choked and nobody choked. This is what life is all about. It’s a cosmic joke.
Karma seems to be real and you’re affected with it all day long. Whatever you do, wherever you go you’re always affected by karma. It is karma that moves your body. It is karma that makes you do things. It is karma that causes situations to come into your life.
Do not try to change a condition. Do not intend to change the situation. For you may appear to change it but this is only an appearance. It will come back again in full force.There is only one way to get rid of it and that is to transcend it by forgiveness, mercy and love. And as you practice forgiveness, mercy and love you inquire, “To whom all this is coming to? Who is experiencing these things? Who is going through all these things?” And again you will discover the I-thought, “I am. I am going through all of these things. I appear to be going through karma. I appear to be suffering. I appear to want to get even with someone.” You’re beginning to realize it’s not you. It is the I. Which is only a thought. Just knowing this alone makes you feel good. For you begin to see that you are free. You are bright and shining. You are Sat-Chit-Ananda, nirvana, ultimate oneness. It is the I that appears to have the problems. You separate yourself from the I, by self-inquiry.
And then you can go further by inquiring, “Where did the I come from?” You never answer that question. By inquiring that is sufficient. And you will find that you’re in the silence, the void. Just by going this far you will feel better than you’ve felt in years. You will feel such joy and such peace. This has nothing to do with enlightenment. But you’re going to feel joy and peace. More so than you ever felt before. Just by inquiring, “Where does the I come from?”
The reason that you feel such joy and peace is because you begin to realize that you are not the I. You have absolutely nothing to do with the problems of the I. It is the I that feels anger. It is the I that feels pain. It is the I that feels rejection. But you ask yourself, “What have I got to do with I? I have absolutely nothing to do with the I.” Therefore again you ask, “Then where did the I come from? Who gave it birth? What is its source?” And you keep quiet.
A feeling of total love will overpower you. For you’re learning to sit in the silence.
That’s the most important point. You want to get to the place where thoughts do not bother you, where things do not annoy you. Where there are no problems and there are no solutions. Where there is no good and there’s no bad. You want to get beyond duality and rest in the silence.
Many of you are getting a glimpse of what I’m talking about right now, as you rest in the silence. You’re not thinking about it, you’re not trying to analyze it, you’re not trying to make it happen, you’re just resting in the silence. Perfectly still.
All of a sudden thoughts come up again. You start over again. You begin again.
You inquire, “To whom do these thoughts come? Who is thinking these thoughts? I am? If I is thinking these thoughts then it has absolutely nothing to do with me. It appears to me as if everything is attached to the I. All of the emotions, the fears, the frustrations, it’s all attached to the I.” Again you say, “Where did the I come from? What is the source of I? Who gave it birth?” You never attempt to answer. You sit in the silence.
Some of you are beginning to feel how good it is to sit in the silence right now. The mind is completely empty. The fears are gone. There is nothing left to tell you anything.
You are quiet, still.
Thoughts pop up again. It makes no difference if they’re good thoughts, bad thoughts or in between. The whole idea is to empty the mind of all thoughts. You inquire
again, “Who is thinking these thoughts? I am? Who am I? What is the source of I? Who gave it birth? Where does this I come from that is giving me all this trouble and keeps thinking and thinking? And bringing up to me all these morbid thoughts, all sorts of happy thoughts, all sorts of thoughts. Where did this I come from? What is its source?”
And again you enter the silence. Where everything is totally still. Where there is no movement. The vasanas have disappeared. There is just perfect stillness.
You’re beginning to discover something very interesting. You’re beginning to discover that you;re able to sit in the silence for longer and longer periods without thought.
It’s taking longer and longer before a thought comes to you. Yet you are not falling asleep.
You’re feeling a peace that you’ve never felt before. You’re beginning to feel an all encompassing love. You begin to experience that the whole universe is an emanation of your own mind. And what you have done is you have pulled the entire universe into your heart, everything! All of the galaxies, the milky ways, the planets, the earth with all of it’s manifestations, everything has vanished. That’s total silence.
When you’re sitting in the silence and the world is still available to you that is not silence. That’s a false silence. The true silence is when the whole world, the whole universe, people, places and things have all disappeared. You have pulled them back into the heart center. That is the true silence. For there is no longer anything to think about. Everything is gone. There is just the void. The beautiful precious void. And you’re beginning to sit in that void, in that silence for longer and longer periods.
When you come out of it the world appears to you again but it’s different. It begins to be different for you. You no longer look at the world in the same way. You no longer see the universe in the same way. You begin to feel everything as an image. You see images on the screen of life. The images keep changing, changing, changing but the screen is always the same. And something begins to tell you that you are that screen. You have always been the screen. Unchanging, absolute pure reality. But you are not free yet. This comes and it goes.
Little by little the thoughts come back again. You begin to feel anger again but less than you did before. You begin to have less interest in your body. The things about your body that used to bother you stop bothering you, stop annoying you. People no longer make you angry or frustrated. This happens little by little. And you can’t wait to practice again.
When you are by yourself and you’re not disturbed you sit down in your favorite chair and you begin to inquire, “To whom do these thoughts come? Why they come to me.
I still feel thoughts. Maybe less than I did before but I still feel things,” you further inquire, “who is the I that feels these things? Where did the I come from? Who gave birth to this feeling I? What is its source?” And now you begin to feel that the I is only a thought. It is one of the thoughts that you’ve been thinking about all these years called the I-thought.
Yet everything is attached to it and you keep seeing it and thinking about it. But now you’re inquiring, “To whom does it come? Who’s feeling it? What is its source?” And you go back into the silence.
Now every time you get into the silence you feel better and better. You feel lighter and lighter. The world again, the universe they’re getting sucked into your heart. The whole universe has gone. All existence has disappeared. Including yourself. There is nothing but the silence.
(long silence) (tape starts abruptly again with Robert. )
…shanti, peace
Feel free to ask any questions.
Glen (SG): Robert is there a possibility that there is fear that we can have that we’re holding on to, perhaps that we’re not even aware of, that could be holding us back because obviously it’s the ego that doesn’t want this to occur and we’re here because we want it as we are but the ego obviously doesn’t and is there something there that perhaps we’re not seeing that could be blocking us?
because of this fear of completely being destroyed in terms of an ego?
R: Whatever it is, it’s a thought and you are to ask, “To whom does it come? Who feels this? To whom does this come? Who believes in a blockage? Who thinks there is a blockage?” It is the ego that does this. That makes you feel that there is a blockage or there is something interfering. Follow it through.
Ask, “To whom does it come? Who is feeling this? I am. Who am I?” And it’ll disappear and you’ll feel freedom. Whatever comes into your head, whatever thought, good or bad or in between. Always inquire, “To whom does it come?” As long as it is a thought then follow it through. Then as you sit in the silence more and more everything will break up and you’ll feel the blockages less and less and you’ll become a total block head. (students laugh) SX: Robert you said try to leave the world alone but when you encounter problems., you didn’t say ignore it. But we also have to face and try to solve our problems? (R: Who does?) What do you mean the body or…? Everyday we do, if we work we also have to solve the problems. (R: Who does? Who does?) If we don’t do that, if we don’t solve the problems, the body, and the I, whoever you say, the ego.
R: Who tells you the problems must be solved? Why do you believe that if you do not think about it the problems would not be solved? It is your ego right now that believes this. You have been brought up and trained to believe that unless I solve the problem it will not be solved. (SX: It’s not that if I solve the problem, well maybe it is not existing the way somebody will look at it, I mean the other person will look at a different way.) Forget about the other person. (SX: Right well sometimes you would say that it’s your problem, you will hear that sentence, “It’s your problem.” Or it’s my problem though, it’s not your business, so on, so forth.) Well who hears this? Who goes through all of this? All this is human thought. (SX: Yeah.) It all has to do with your ego and your mind. Go beyond that. Do not rest at that level go totally completely beyond the mind. (SX: Yeah and then just sit still and do nothing?) You will sit still and do nothing for a while. But something will pick you up and make you do the
things you have to do. And you will find that they are done better than you will have ever done yourself. Everything will be done. See you’re sitting there and you’re worrying that nothing will be done, when you’re sitting still. But you will sit still for a while and when you get up you will go about your business. Without even thinking of it. And your business will be done and everything will take care of itself.
The whole idea is to stop believing that you have to do it. Stop believing that you are the doer. Surrender everything. Let go of everything and see what happens. (pause) In other words when your mind tells you I have business to take care of, and if I don’t take care of it nobody will take care of it and it will fall down. Then ask yourself, “Who said so?
Who says this?” (SX: So in other words, if I doesn’t do that you say that somebody else will take care of it or it will take care of itself?) You will take care of it that is what I mean it will take care of itself. You will do it. But yet you are still not the doer. (SX: Well that’s what I’m saying then, and ‘I’ identify with, as the doer, has to do something. If the body or the mind tells me I have to do something however that is.) The body, the mind and the I are all the same. (SX: Right.) Therefore when you transcend the body, the mind and the I, the Self, the absolute reality will take care of everything through your body. Yet you will realize that you are not the doer and you’re not the body. But there will be an appearance of doing the work and doing it better than you ever done it before. You will appear to be doing it. But you will know that nothing is happening. There is no one doing anything. (SX: So in other words we just imagine that it’s a problem? When we encounter a problem we think it’s a problem but you’re saying that it in reality, is no problem. We look at it as a problem?) You see it as a problem. Your ego sees it as a problem. (SX: Right.) Yet the problem does not exist accept for the ego. So when the ego is transcended there is no problem. Yet you will still appear to be doing the work.
Fred (SF): An experience to understand. When I fold a towel I fold it much quickly much more quickly and much neater than ever I did in the past without really thinking. (R: Umm.) Is that what you’re talking about?
R: That is a good point, exactly. It’s like when you’re walking on the curb when you cross the street. You do it automatically you don’t think about it. You’ve done it for so many years that you cross the street, you go on the curb, you step off the curb. Your body is doing it. Yet you are not conscious of it. You do it automatically.
Fred (SF): So you’re talking about spontaneity aren’t you. (R: Yes.) Just doing things in the now without worrying about the immediate cost or the immediate future or even the result.
R: Yes. Now you will do what you have to do. Everything that has to be done now will be done. Yet you will realize that you are not the doer. You are not the person doing anything. And you will be in total happiness and total peace.
Glen (SG): Robert when this happens do we cease at that point to have any kind of interior life whatsoever? (R: Any kind of interior life?) As we know it now? (R: You mean when you awaken?) Umm-hmm.
R: When you awaken there is no one left to have any kind of interior life at all.SR: I found it. (students laugh)
SK: It’s not so bad if there is no exterior life either is it?
R: No, same thing. There is no exterior life, there is no interior life. There is nobody left to have that.
SX: Why is it that you say there is no mistake in life although sometimes you, we always look at it… Say if you burn yourself, you learn from that mistake you try to not get burned again.
Would you call that a mistake or…?
R: That is human endeavor. Even though you try and you make a mistake and then you learn from the mistake. If you keep it up in a human way something else will happen. There is always something happening to a human being. This works, this doesn’t work, you learn from this. Then you have a new trial to learn from. Then you have to do something else and you learn from that. It never stops. It goes on and on. What we want to do is transcend it. Get rid of the whole bowl of wax. Let go of everything completely. Stop playing the game. (SX: But then you wouldn’t call that a mistake, it’s just…) You wouldn’t call anything. There would be nobody left to call anything. You’ll be free of calling it. Only when you’re a human being with an ego do you call a spade a spade. Why do you call a spade a spade? (laughter) If you want to call a spade a spade go ahead. But when you’re completely empty and there is nobody home, there is nobody left then there is nothing to do. But you will be doing everything that has to be done.
SX: Then why do we have to go through all those experiences in different ways? (R: Who does?) We all do.
R: Speak for yourself. You’re seeing all these experiences. And you believe you have to go through everything in different ways. But it is your ego that believes this, not you. It is the mind that believes this not you. You are not your mind, you are not your ego, you are total freedom. But as long as you’re thinking with your mind, with your ego then it appears that you go through different experiences in different ways. (SX: Yeah but actually I experience that I am nobody, it’s so painful though, you know it’s…) (Robert plays puppet that was given to him as a gift from Ed & Kerema) Puppet says: Are you always this stupid? Are you always this stupid? (laughter) R: All is Well. (laughter continues)
Jorge (SR): Robert, can we say that fear wakes up the ego?
Puppet says: You’re a schmuck! The biggest! (students laugh) R: What was your question? (students laugh again)
Jorge (SR): I did, he said, “Are you a schmuck?” (R: Tell me.) Can you say that fear is what wakes up the ego?
R: Fear doesn’t wake up anything. What wakes up the ego is to inquire, “Where did it come from? Who has the fear?”
Jorge (SR): I’m saying that a person goes through life kind of unconsciously. Unafraid, relaxed and everything is happening as it should and all of a sudden they run into something and I’m asking, is it possible that they feel a little worried and fear and then they say, “Oh I’ve got to do it. I’ve got to take charge now to make sure this goes right.”
R: You’re still playing the human game. (SR: I’m saying, is that when they’re entering the human game is when they become fearful?) It’s part of the human game when you become fearful. When you become fearful… (SR: What I’m saying without fear are they living in the Self?) No. (SR: You sure?) (laughter) The Self is total freedom. (laughter) The Self is total freedom it knows nothing about fear… (SR: Yeah.) …It knows nothing about gains. (SR: I have a hunch we’re not understanding each other.) What are you saying?
Jorge (SR): I’m saying that if a person is living without fear. Maybe resting in their self but as soon as they run into a situation where they get a little fearful and start worrying and something in them says, “Oh I got to take charge to make sure this works out right,” then do they enter into the ego?
R: Oh yes that is true. Right. (SR: So fear is kind of like the red flag that, “Oh here comes the ego?”) You can say that. But why say it? (SR: Because I like to… umm …because my ego likes to understand.) Ask yourself, “Who likes to understand? Where does the ego come from?
Why do I want to know all of these things?” Make your life very simple. Don’t get into mind games. Simply empty yourself out, totally completely, become totally empty, of all the words, of all the deeds, of all the thoughts. When you’re totally empty everything will take care of itself.
SK: Robert you mentioned something earlier about a way of awakening - I think that is what you said — a possible way to awakening if there is a way — was through humility, compassion and love. Now if I’m in a state of anger or my ego has been hurt or whatever, so old wounds that I’ve been hanging onto all of my life. Should I just ignore that feeling or recognize that feeling as who this feeling is coming to? And just override it and just…
R: You can’t ignore it. If you ignore it you’ll sublimate it and it will always be there. You have to face it head on by inquiring, “To whom does it come? Who is feeling this? Where did it come from?” (SK: So where is the forgiveness and compassion?) As you keep practicing this forgiveness and compassion come by itself. As you practice self-inquiry you become more compassionate. You become very forgiving. You have mercy on yourself. (SK: What I was just thinking about you seem to use the words, “You practice, compassion mercy and love.”) Yes you practice mercy and love as you practice self-inquiry. (SK: But then aren’t you also saying that it’s a kind of spontaneous thing that begins to happen as you practice self-inquiry?) It happens as you practice, yes. (SK: You can’t do it by the numbers like you can self-inquiry like you can’t say, “Now I’m going to do a love thing and follow this procedure…”) Not really but you can think about these things. You can think about being compassionate, being loving… (SK: But you can’t necessarily force it?) You don’t force it you just think about it. You practice self-inquiry as you think about these things. You become a living embodiment of compassion, love and forgiveness. (SK: Hope?) Sure.
Glen (SG): So what you say happens like the ego gets less hurt. It doesn’t get so sensitive it’s not there as much.R: Yes. As the ego becomes weaker and weaker and it begins to disappear, it’s hurt less and less. What used to hurt it before does not hurt anymore that way.
(silence)
Do you have the Jnani Henry?
(Mary reads the Confessions of the Jnani refer beginning of this book for text) R: Thank you Mary. (SM: Thank you Robert.)
R: Do we have any announcements?
Mary (SM): Ah no. We’ve finally got transcript 53 out.
R: We have prashad.
Thanks to Tony Lightman we have this prashad which is delicious. It’s very powerful. So eat it gently. Do not force it. Chew it fifty times. (laughter) And we have also almond cookies. Twin dragon. No animal fat. No tropical oil.
Smells good. Eat drink and be Merry.
Mary (SM): Don’t say that. (students laugh)
(prashad continues)
R: Thank you for coming…
(tape ends)
Absätze ohne Sprecherpräfix gehören dem zuletzt genannten Sprecher — so steht es im Buch, wo der Präfix nur den Anfang einer Rede markiert. Die Zuordnung ist eine Folgerung dieser Ausgabe. Namen in Klammern sind aus dem Text erschlossen: sicher belegt sind SM = Mary, SF = Fred, SJ = Jay, SC = Nate, wahrscheinlich SG = Glen, SR = Jorge. Alle anderen Kürzel bleiben stehen, weil der Beleg nicht trägt.